Would you like to know something funny? Before I met Stuart I was adamant I did not want children. I like being a big child myself and I actually don’t like children. I mean not ALL children just a certain age bracket. Children between the ages of 5 and 10 have lost their cuteness and just become annoying to a person with no patience… That would be me. Anyway, I was a young care-free lass who had the world ahead of her but then I met my lobster. We were both party animals enjoying the drink culture we had become accustomed to, he was a DJ too. Then one day things got serious, we started talking about the future and the idea of having children just came naturally.
2015 – Oops, I’m pregnant
The talk of the future we had didn’t include me having children until I was at least 26 but “life happens when you’re busy making plans” and at the age of 20 there I was sitting on the toilet with a wee covered stick in my hand. It showed a positive result after 17 seconds.
My pregnancy with Charlotte was yucky. I had morning sickness, swollen everything, food aversion, heart burn… The lot. However, the minute Lottie was placed on my chest it was all worth it.
After that I knew I wanted a big family. I think I would’ve easily had six children if we could afford it but we couldn’t so I settled on the idea of four. Stuart did not relish the thought.
2018 – Finally! Baby No. 2
Stuart definitely wanted two children and he wanted to wait until Lottie was at nursery before we had the second but one night he came home broody and that was that. We tried for 10 months and to be honest there came a point when I thought it would never happen but eventually in May 2018 I found I was three weeks pregnant.
My pregnancy with Kieran was painful. It was totally different to my pregnancy with Charlotte. This time it was sore hips, sore pelvis, sore back, sore feet, sore legs and a lot of Braxton Hicks… Everything ached. I had forgotten just how much I didn’t like being pregnant.
All the way through my pregnancy I still talked about having more.
The Turning Point
I guess the realisation hit me when I was in labour. I already had my girl and I was so glad I was having a boy this time, I got such an odd feeling at the thought of having another boy or girl, like anger at the thought of my little ones being replaced. Obviously, it doesn’t happen like that but the feeling alone made me second guess having more.
After the birth the midwives and I joked about the “next time” and Stuart scoffed adding that family tickets only cater for four people. I laughed because I knew he was right. A family of five changes everything.
Why Two Children Is Enough For Us
Later that day Lottie was to meet her new baby brother. I was so excited for this moment and I was worried at the same time. I was worried Lottie wouldn’t like him or accept him. How wrong could I have been?!
Lottie waltzed right in asking for her brother. The next few seconds were so strange and cliché but watching the two of them together was like watching the final piece of a puzzle being placed. I imagined our lives as a family together. I imagined them growing up, going to their after school activities, going on holidays, graduating. In that moment I knew our family was complete.
I do still want a family of five but the fifth member is to be that of the furry kind.